Dear Mom:
Howdy. Thanks for dressing me up like a gay cowboy. I really appreciate it. I guess they don't sell assless chaps at Babies R Us. You know, I think I'm a little young to be trying out for the Village People. Just a thought.
Love, your son
Dear Mike:
I know we haven't met yet, but this isn't me. You have to trust me on this.
Cheers, Jude
Dear Jude:
ReplyDeleteYes, we haven't met yet. I will say that it is very probable that when we do become acquainted, we will be close, be friends. Your genetics and upbringing nearly dictate that you will be somebody I care about deeply.
This is why I feel very comfortable in telling you that when you are in the sixth grade, I plan on selling these pictures to you. You will agree to any price to avoid your friends in homeroom from seeing them.
You should know this: friends are a mixed blessing.
Cheers,
Mike