September 11, 2009 10:42 a.m.

The times they are a changin', my friend. My last fifteen minutes.

So here's something interesting. I'm changing my kid for the first time, and there's Mexican black tar heroin coming out of his ass. And this prodigious output has continued. In other words, I've thrown away dirty diapers with a street value of at least fifteen thousand dollars, according to the chart I found at the Department of Justice website. And those are friend prices.

September 10, 2009 11:01 a.m.

Where snarky self-satisfaction meets sentimental reality. My last fifteen minutes.

I admit that the entire idea for this web page came about as a reaction to the here's-what-I'm-doing-right-now-blog-and-twitter nation, etc. I admit that it wasn't necessarily an original idea. I also admit that instead of commenting on this cultural phenomenon, I just endined up trying to do it smarter and with more restraint (with uneven success). Probably the only thing more pathetic than a person who spends his time publishing everything he just did or thought, is the man who spends his time making fun of that person.

That being said, I am now sitting in the delivery room with my lovely wife, waiting for her to deliver a little bundle of awesome. That's what I'm doing right now. I don't have a joke or anything, it's just that if you're going to have a blog titled "The Last Fifteen Minutes", you should probably take advantage on one of those occasions when something truly eventful is happening.

So instead of enjoying every minute of this special moment, I'm engaging in the kind of empty narrative and parochial commentary for which I have developed such a profound distaste. So, basically, on this one, I suck. Yay, me.

I am, for the moment, unredeemed.